The Greatest Snowman
The Greatest Snowman is the first episode of the third series of Sweet Sow. Script Hitchhiker: Welcome to the 2018 Sweet Sow Christmas special. I’m your ho- Voice: (offscreen) Continue or else... Hitchhiker: Yes sir. I'm your host, Fred Figglehorn. And- Dan: Excuse me, but please make sure this episode contains a lot of foot humor compared to the first two series. Hitchhiker: No thanks. Mummy Pig: Hey host person! You are the biggest Pippi Longstocking fan out there! Hitchhiker: (singing in Geckel Homus's voice) Horrid heart and graphic high. Mummy Pig: Don't you dare tell me our show is getting canceled. (Geckel Homus flies out of the hitchhiker's spirit.) Geckel Homus: From now on, I am the executive producer of Sweet Sow. Hitchhiker: Please fuck off. I’m the host of this special. Geckel Homus: You can still be the host, but I'm under control of the rest of the show. Peppa: I’m actually the one who controls the show. Geckel Homus: No, you aren't. Agusti Chairdonai: No, it's me. Peppa is too young to be the executive producer. Peppa: WAH! Dan: I thought I was the producer. Geckel Homus: Well, you're fired. Dan: YOU SHALL NOT FIRE DAN SCHNEIDER! Look what you made me do. (Dan’s feet start growing.) Geckel Homus: Let's move on, shall we? Voice: (offscreen) You’re a mean one, Mr. Paul. A Chihuahua furry: Fuck you bitch! I have stinky farts. Geckel Homus: Let's move on, shall we? Voice: (offscreen) You’re a mean one, Mr. Paul. A Chihuahua furry: Fuck you bitch! I have stinky farts. Geckel Homus: Let's move on, shall we? Voice: (offscreen) You’re a mean one, Mr. Paul. A Chihuahua furry: Fuck you bitch! I have stinky farts. Geckel Homus: Let's move on, shall we? Voice: (offscreen) You’re a mean one, Mr.- Geckel Homus: Move on to the goddamn episode or else Sweet Sow is canceled. A Chihuahua furry: Poor Prince Mason... Geckel Homus: Move on to the goddamn episode or else Sweet Sow is canceled. A Chihuahua furry: Poor Prince Mason... Geckel Homus: Move on to the goddamn episode or else Sweet Sow is canceled. A Chihuahua furry: Poor Prince Mason... Geckel Homus: Move on to the goddamn episode or else Sweet Sow is canceled. A Chihuahua furry: Poor Prince Mason... Geckel Homus: Move on to the goddamn episode or else Sweet Sow is canceled. A Chihuahua furry: Poor Prince Mason... Mason: Chet yo asses up cause I’m Santa. Ho ho ho bitches! Agusti Chairdonai: You're not the real Mason. Dan: Let’s watch The Eediots Christmas Special from 1966. Agusti Chairdonai: You're not the real Mason. Dan: Let’s watch The Eediots Christmas Special from 1966. Agusti Chairdonai: You're not the real Mason. Dan: Let’s watch The Eediots Christmas Special from 1966. (Mason transforms into Charles Manson.) Charles Manson: Surprise bitches! Voice: (offscreen) You’re a mean one, Mr. Manson. Hitchhiker: And now, enjoy the show. Mummy Pig: Uncle Goat is 3,046 years old. Hitchhiker: And now, enjoy the show. Mummy Pig: Uncle Goat is 3,046 years old. Hitchhiker: And now, enjoy the show. Mummy Pig: Uncle Goat is 3,046 years old. Hitchhiker: And now, enjoy the show. (The title card appears, but disappears quickly.) Teo Tiger: Ciao! Mummy Pig: How am I supposed chow down on this shit? Also I don’t speak Turkish, so- Hitchhiker: Enjoy the show. (The title card appears again.) Terrible TV Shows Wiki: (offscreen) I am the ghost of Terrible TV Shows Wiki and Sweet Sow is a terrible TV show. Why it sucks! Number on- TBA Trivia *This episode's title is a pun of The Greatest Snowman. Category:Sweet Sow episodes Category:Episodes